Friday, May 14, 2010


I am a regular lurker of blogs and discussion boards.  I don't generally post comments or "follow" anyone.  I read a blog fairly regularly in which the blogger uses incorrect punctuation and grammar.  It makes me nutty, but I keep reading because she reminds me of the notes we used to pass in high school.  Last week sometime, she did an entry into her blog that has been on my mind this week.  She used the ABC's and described her life.  You know... A is for Awesome Family!  It was fun to see how she used the letters XYZ!  Here is my attempt to do the same only using FIBROMYALGIA and my life with it:

F - Fibro Fog.  The Double F.  The other "F" word.  Forgetfulness.  Another F word that can describe the Fibro Fog. 

I - Insomnia.  So, Fibromyalgia is a smorgasbord of catch 22's.  If you are tired the fibro pain is worse.   But, as the pain increases the less you sleep.  When I was younger, sleep was my favorite hobby.  Now, I am lucky if I get 5 uninterrupted hours a night.

B - Bitch.  I feel like that is all I do.  Complain.  I used to enjoy complaining when I needed to get things off my chest.  Now, all the joy is gone from that hobby.  So what?  I hurt today.  Just like yesterday.  Nothing new.  Joy - gone.

R - Relief.  There is none.  Ha! 

O - Obsessive.  My state of mind when I am in pain.  I am obsessive about the pain or any relief (ha!) I can find.  Which only makes things worse for the fatigue and the pain.

M - Massage!  They feel so very good!  Every Fibro patient needs multiple!

Y - Yikes!  Everyday, that is a word that goes through my brain as I try to unbend from a position I have been in too  long.  Yikes!  Those muscles HURT!

A - I am ABLE to cope with this.  And that is a great realization that I have had recently.  It sucks. But, I can do it!

L - This is a LIFE LONG LIFE style change.  Get used to it!

G - Weight GAIN.  Just what every woman wants.  But, that is a side effect.  You get so fatigued and you hurt so bad, moving is not an option, never mind exercise. 

I - Irritating.  That's all.... it is irritating! And not just for me, I am sure.  For everyone that gets to deal with the Fibro me.

A - Fibromyalgia may be with me for the rest of my life, but it AIN'T going to rule my life!  Hell  Ya! 

Thursday, April 29, 2010

6 Months...

The doctor’s appointment where I was diagnosed was on October 30, 2009. Today is April 29, 2010. I have been living with the knowledge that I have Fibromyalgia for 6 months. Amazingly, I have survived. I have even started to figure out how to live with it. And, I have decided that my daily life is easier to live now that I have the knowledge. I get to blame things on Fibro! I lost my keys this morning – or rather, I didn’t remember where I placed them the last time I used them. Guess what is at fault for that? Not lil ole me! Nope – it is “Fibro Fog”! I love the term “Fibro Fog”! I still get annoyed when I forget what I am saying in the midst of a sentence or forget to whom I have told a story. But, now that I know what it is and that it really isn’t my entire fault for being a blonde, it makes the “Fog” more livable.

This past winter was a difficult one for Oklahoma. We had some MAJOR SNOW STORMS. Which, I loved when I lived in Michigan in my youth. This year, however, I noticed that it was difficult to move. My legs ached daily. I wanted to bury myself under the covers and hibernate until the sun came out. And for the first time in my 31 years, I was looking forward to spring. Up until this year, winter was my favorite season. You get to wear thick and comfy socks, sweaters to cover your winter weight gain, wear your favorite leather winter coat and coffee and hot cocoa taste so much better when it is cold outside. But, this winter, I couldn’t keep warm, I became very acquainted with my heating pad, and insomnia ruled my life. Everything hurt to the point of tears at the end of the day. I got nothing accomplished at home and I became a bear to live with – my poor family! The hardest is when the kid wanted to go outside and play in the snow; I got to watch from the window. Nothing is more depressing.

But, spring has sprung. FINALLY!